Wimbledon Tennis Championships 2009: How to get in

Ah, it's Wimbledon time again. Overpriced strawberries, ostentatiously dressed Old Etonians, and an increasingly fossilised Cliff Richard. Some things never change about SW19, least of all the clamour for the top tickets; demand for the premier two courts - No.1 and Centre (the two best in the business, I might add, having been) - remains higher than an MP's expenses bill.

What makes Wimbledon special and unique is that it remains one of the few major sporting events where it's possible to buy tickets on the day - but don't expect to actually be able to. To illustrate, tickets for a special exhibition to mark the opening of the new roof at Centre Court, which took place on May 15th, sold out in five minutes.

How the masses do it

Around 500 tickets for each of the Centre Court (except for the last four days), No.1 and No.2 Courts are reserved for sale at turnstiles every day. Payment at turnstiles is cash only and debit/credit cards are not accepted.

Prices vary depending on when you visit. Week 1 is £40-62 for Centre Court and £37-55 for Court No.1. In week 2 it's £72-100 for Centre Court and around £62 for Court No.1. (The price actually goes down because there aren't many matches toward the end of the week on Court No.1).

If you can't get a ticket for one of the courts there are 6000 ground tickets available every day.

How you do it

So those are the facts. But the fact is, you don't want to wait in line. We can imagine there is nothing more dispiriting than festering in the Great British Queue's answer to cattle class, surrounded by chuckleheads in Union Jack hats, on a pilgrimage to see the hallowed turf of Henman heartbreakers of yore. These are the people you hear screaming `Come on Tim!' many years after the perennial loser hung up his increasingly failing racket. It never was funny, and is less so in the inevitable rain.

Avoid Henmaniacs who can't let go

Getting the best seats may not save you from the vacuous chants of those guys up in Row Z, but it'll mean you won't have to watch their crazy dances, barring freak reflections in the new sunroof (or rainroof, as is the case) sported by Centre Court for the first time this year.

But how to secure the top spots? Well, we know the right man. Top hospitality boss Keith Prowse says: "We are running a special promotion for the Men's Quarter Finals and on the hospitality side offering a table of 10 for the price of seven."

Through the VIP Tour package Prowse can get you the best Centre Court ticket in the house, the finest hospitality in The Gatsby Club and one night's accommodation in the Cumberland Hotel, London's newest world-class hotel. Spectators experience optimum consumer comfort with new, wider padded seating - and the Gatsby Club is a luxurious place to unwind.

In regards to the itinerary, the Club opens at 10:30, with a champagne and canapÈ reception at 11:00. To follow at 11:30, a three-course a la carte lunch is served with specially selected wines, and your match ticket is issued during lunch. At 1pm, it's time to take your seat and relax, as play begins on Centre. And at 4pm enjoy traditional Wimbledon afternoon tea with strawberries.

Guaranteed top ticket

So, you're a CEO with some unprecedented leisure time, dammit, and you need to be there! Here is another answer then - Sportsworld. As an officially appointed hospitality agent, Sportsworld's Wimbledon tickets are 100 percent guaranteed - and you get the same exclusive experience you would expect at the prices. Which are steep. Like you care. Sportsworld can get you that top seat as well as a host of other treats.

And for companies wishing to host their clients and colleagues, there are two hospitality options: Village Suite and Private Chalet, the latter applying to groups of 30 or more, and with both, the perks are endless. As well as getting you your choice of official Wimbledon tickets, the package includes Champagne and canapÈs on arrival, four course a la carte lunch, car park passes and valet service, and much more.

So that's how the CEO does things. The question now is - who wins? Don't count out Roger Federer just yet - Coral are going 5/2 for the Swiss. And as a result of those odds, I have my eye on the 2010 corporate package.