The perfect day of golf requires a meaningful setting. This does not necessarily constitute a hefty green fee or an exotic location. For example, I recently had the privilege of playing an impromptu nine holes on the humble tract that provided the backdrop for my personal baptism into the sport 15 years ago. This being rural Michigan, in a converted cow pasture, I can assure the reader that there was little to no prestige involved in playing the front 9 of said course (which also, incidentally, is the back 9). What made the experience considerably more valuable than the $10 green fee was roving the fairways of my youth in the light of a decade’s worth of experience, on and off the course.
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Secondly, the members of the foursome are pivotal to the perfect golf experience. If misery loves company, then the culture of golf is designed for creating a great time out of a horrible experience. I had the honor of playing a great resort course on the gulf coast in Alabama. As the caddie came up to take my clubs, I proceeded with the formalities of informing him of my game, and my anticipation of the upcoming round. Being a cordial individual with an innate ability to place people at ease with my engaging sense of humor {sic} he felt free to refrain from suppressing his laughter when I told him that I was a 4 handicap.
Assuming there was another source of his outburst, as I was very proud of my hard-earned handicap, I asked what was so funny. He simply responded, “Oh sir, fours have A LOT of fun here … I hope you’re good from the sand.” At the time, I was horrific from the sand, and it turns out that his revelation of single digit handicapped golfers enjoying the course was either severely misplaced or harshly sarcastic. What do caddies know anyway? Point being that golf is the only activity where skill and enjoyment are not necessarily interconnected. The trick is to find three other people who enjoy the struggle as much as you.
Finally, the perfect day of golf requires attention to time off the course. After all, a round of golf only requires the small commitment of 4 hours and 20 minutes. In the case of 9 holes in a rural Michigan field this drops to 50 minutes, and on a beach in Alabama in balloons to almost 6 hours. What can I say? The rest of my foursome was bad from the sand, too. What matters most is that the entirety of the day is occupied with people you enjoy being with, in a meaningful environment, engaged in an activity that, good or bad, makes you relax and remember what life is like when you go slow enough to stop and smell the roses … because I found your Titleist with the ridiculous smiley face on it and it’s under a rosebush.
